


(fight or) flight

by popnographic



Series: Rarepair drabbles [31]
Category: Free!
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Fluff, Getting Back Together, M/M, Post-Break Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-27
Updated: 2018-05-27
Packaged: 2019-05-14 05:47:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14763779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/popnographic/pseuds/popnographic
Summary: A guide on how to screw up so badly you have to move from Iwatobi to Tokyo, courtesy of Shigino Kisumi.





	(fight or) flight

**Author's Note:**

> written for kisumi's birthday, may 26 2018.

It starts the way Kisumi imagines most relationships do. Lots of sex, the so-called honeymoon phase where everything’s bathed in a rosy pink light and he feels like he’s walking on clouds. Days where they’re barely leaving each other’s side, let alone the apartment, always being the disgusting couple people loathed to be around. It was very unexpected for someone like Haruka to feel and act that way, too, but it wasn’t as if Kisumi would complain. Quite the contrary; Kisumi remembers how happy he’d been for Haruka to be so open with how he felt, how warm Kisumi had felt inside whenever Haruka laughed or smiled.

It ends the way Kisumi imagines most relationships do. Rarely has he seen Haruka angry, but this is one of those times, and Kisumi isn’t proud to be part of the reason for it. Both of them don’t tend to get angry that easily, and up until now, they’ve only had a handful of arguments in the three years they’ve been dating. But for them to both be angry and screaming now means shit really _did_ go south.

Things didn’t blow up all in one day; it’s been a gradual change neither of them have cared enough about to try and put a stop to. Maybe it was about time. Relationships in general don’t have an expiration date, but some last longer than others. Kisumi has yet to ask Makoto and Rin what their secret is to have been together for as long as they have. He knows they tend to fight and bicker sometimes, but it seems apparently they talk things out. Kisumi and Haruka rarely argue, but when they do, they instead tend to sweep things under the rug.

And that’s probably why they’re here now.

“Did it ever occur to you to maybe think of what _I_ want in this relationship?”

Haruka looks at Kisumi like he’d just offended Haruka’s entire bloodline. “The fuck’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’m saying it’s always been about you, Haru! How I was the one who had to move into your house instead of the other way around. How I’ve always supported your decisions, yet even the smallest thing I want to say, you ridicule or criticise. It’s just been you, you, you. You can’t blame me for getting tired of it.”

“Always been about _me_?!” Haruka roars. “I asked you to move in here because I thought it’d be better, space-wise for the both of us. I only questioned _some_ of your choices because I wanted the best for you. The fact that you dare say I ridiculed you when all I did was stand by your side pisses me off.”

Kisumi snorts incredulously. “You asked me to move here, you say. Do you remember making it into a _discussion_? I don’t. You questioned my choices because you didn’t like them, even if they had absolutely nothing to do with you. Like I said: always about you.”

“And what are you implying?”

_So he’s admitting it?_

“That you’re really fucking selfish, Haru.”

Haruka stares at Kisumi with shock, which only helps to make Kisumi angrier. But he’s tired, he’s done. There’s nothing left to do but pull the plug, because this poor fucker’s not gonna survive no matter what they try to do. He won’t deny that it hurts a little that Haruka’s apparently given up, too. When Haruka doesn’t even bother defending himself anymore, Kisumi knows.

When they finally stop screaming, when they’re empty of things to yell at each other, Kisumi just sinks down on the floor, and stares out into the open. He’d like to be oblivious enough to be able to wonder how this all happened, but Kisumi knows damn well how and why they ended up here. He knows why this apartment is soon going to be empty, and why he probably won’t see Haruka again after they’ve moved out.

Kisumi hears Haruka stomp around the apartment, but he doesn’t get up from the floor. Instead, he sits on the floor while Haruka packs a bag with a few belongings and then heads out the door, making sure to slam it behind him to prove yet another, useless point. Kisumi at least has the energy to snort to himself before he gets up and locks the door. Well, maybe he can start packing some of his own stuff now, too. Haruka slamming the door behind him when heading over to Makoto’s marked the beginning of their separation, and it begins with an empty apartment.

 

* * *

 

The only time they talk after the breakup is when Haruka and Kisumi officially move out and have signed the necessary papers. Even the landlady seems uncomfortable with the tension between the two former occupants, but to be fair, it would be strange if she _wasn’t_ uncomfortable. Kisumi even feels a bit of it, but probably not as much as an outsider would.

Since his uncle, Katsumi, owns a real-estate firm and having contacts practically all over Japan, Katsumi helps his nephew get an apartment in Chofu, Tokyo. The reason that finally convinced Kisumi to move to Tokyo was the fact that Sousuke lives in Tokyo, too. That means Kisumi won’t be arriving in a new place not knowing anyone—at least he’ll have Sousuke. It’ll be nice to catch up with him again, though Kisumi wishes it had been under better circumstances than him moving away from Iwatobi after a breakup.

Slowly but surely, Kisumi begins moving to his little one-bedroom apartment in Chofu. It’s a ten-minute walk to the nearest train station, and there’s a few supermarkets and shops around, but Kisumi guesses he probably won’t be spending too much time around the area apart from when he leaves and comes back home to the apartment.

It feels strange to live somewhere else now. The change was gradual, but now that Kisumi’s actually in Tokyo, standing in his apartment filled with cardboard boxes and a few pieces of furniture, he realises just how fast things actually went. In only a few months, he went from being in a relationship, living in Iwatobi, to now being single and starting to live in Tokyo.

To think that _he_ would be the one to end up in Tokyo. For the longest time, people always assumed Haruka would move to Tokyo after his high school graduation to pursue professional swimming. It wasn’t until he protested loudly that people realised it wasn’t what he wanted to do. Haruka likes swimming, but he also wants to be free. Kisumi always thought that kind of lifestyle would never fit Haruka, and that was, in the end, one of the last things they would still agree on.

Kisumi meets up with Sousuke on a Friday evening when Sousuke’s gotten off work. He works as a swimming coach for elementary school kids, which is his way of still working in the swimming environment without doing too much swimming himself. His shoulder may be mostly healed these days, but Sousuke’s told Kisumi that chasing a dream of becoming a professional swimmer is a thing of the past.

“I can’t believe you’re in Tokyo. It feels so weird.”

“Good or bad weird?” Kisumi asks, smiling, before he takes a sip from his beer.

Sousuke huffs, rolling his eyes. “Do you honestly think I’d say ’bad’? Come on. So, what happened? _Why_ are you here?”

“It’s a long—”

“—story. I know, you said that already. What _is_ the story?”

So Kisumi tells Sousuke about how his relationship with Haruka at some point started crumbling to pieces, and how it in the end was completely unsalvageable. It’s still a little surreal to think about the fact that, after three years, this is where they both ended up. Well, Kisumi doesn’t know exactly _where_ Haruka’s going to end up, and at the time of moving out, he hadn’t cared, but now he can’t help but wonder. Some part of him still cares, after all.

Haruka and Kisumi started dating in high school. Maybe not officially, but nevertheless. Kisumi had been by Haruka’s side throughout his breakdown which was the result of people around him constantly pressuring him about his future as a swimmer. Haruka was never in it for the times, for the records, for the medals. Kisumi knew, he’d understood that, and maybe that was part of what brought them together.

To outsiders, Haruka and Kisumi look like polar opposites. Kisumi likes sweets, Haruka doesn’t. Kisumi played basketball growing up, Haruka was a swimmer. Kisumi was always outgoing while Haruka was the more quiet type. Even so, they’d managed to find each other, and fall in love. Kisumi wonders if maybe their many differences led to their breakup after so many years together. They’d been friends for the longest time before that, too, which is what made it all so much worse. Because now, there’s nothing left.

“… Wow,” Sousuke says after a while. “I’m sorry, Kisumi.”

Kisumi shrugs. “Shit happens. Wasn’t meant to be, in the end.”

He doesn’t want to say too much; Kisumi is still bitter and angry about how things ended up between him and Haruka, so his view of his ex-boyfriend is definitely not shared by others who are friends with him. Sousuke and Haruka may have been arch nemeses in the past, but they buried the hatchet near the end of high school, and have been good friends since. Kisumi knows better than to try and taint Sousuke’s image of Haruka—it isn’t his place to do so.

That evening, to celebrate having moved to Tokyo and being with Sousuke again, Kisumi lets himself drink a little more than he usually would. It helps to temporarily wash away his anger and hurt feelings, replacing it with intoxicated happiness instead. He and Sousuke talk for a long time, catching up on things that have happened since the last time they met, and Kisumi laughs more than he has in a long time. It feels nice to be on his way back to being normal again.

At the end of the night, they get on separate trains back home, and when Kisumi comes back to his dark, empty apartment, it feels as if he hasn’t been drinking anything at all, and all of those feelings he’d had before he met Sousuke that evening come back to punch him in the gut.

Kisumi doesn’t even take his shoes as he races into the bathroom where he throws up in the toilet.

 

* * *

 

For the first three months, Kisumi works as an intern at Katsumi’s real-estate agency. Despite having a degree, there’s still a bit left to learn, but Kisumi does his best to try and catch up. Burying himself in work is a lot more effective than drinking, Kisumi finds out, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t go out drinking with Sousuke every now and then. He meets new people at work, meets some of Sousuke’s co-workers when they go out to drink. It feels like maybe it won’t be too difficult to adjust to a completely new life, after all.

Both unconsciously and not, Kisumi has avoided talking to anyone still living in Iwatobi, most of all Makoto. It wouldn’t surprise him if Makoto’s pissed off at him—that would actually be a good thing, because it means Kisumi won’t have to talk to him about what happened. The last Kisumi heard of Haruka’s whereabouts was that he was still living with Makoto and Rin, but Kisumi also knows that Haruka wouldn’t want to live there forever. Haruka hates mooching off of other people, so he’s probably been looking desperately for a new place to live.

Rin had sent him a text message the day Kisumi moved the last of his things, thus having made his last trip back to Iwatobi. ‘ _here if u wanna talk_ ’ was all he wrote, but Kisumi’s completely okay with the brevity of the message. Nothing more needs to be said; Rin is there should Kisumi ever want to talk. Not that he’s sure he _would_ want to talk about those things with Rin, but he still appreciates the gesture. It’s nice to know people care.

In the span of just about half a year, Kisumi manages to climb the ladder and start selling properties himself. Studying real estate may have been a good choice, after all, despite the scepticism it had been met with originally. It’s a lucrative job, for the most part, and most of all, Kisumi thinks it’s _fun_. He’s good at interacting with people, and what’s probably the best quality to have in this field of work is that he’s very good at being convincing without sounding forceful.

His latest clients have a two-bedroom house in Koganei that they’re hoping to sell for at least five-hundred thousand yen. Kisumi himself would estimate it to sell for at least twenty-thousand less than that, mostly because it hasn’t been renovated in a while, and it’s generally not as modern as other houses in the area. But, it’s another job, and it’s in a pretty good area. People are always somewhat desperate to find a place to live, and Kisumi’s good at talking.

“Are the tatami mats replaceable?”

 _Why wouldn’t they be?_ “Of course,” he says. “Not a fan?”

The woman makes an uncomfortable grimace. Stingy, apparently. “Not of the smell, no.”

“Well, if you _do_ decide to buy, the choice is all yours. The only thing that has a few restrictions is the backyard, which you already know of.”

“Oh, yes.”

“In the grand scheme of things,” Kisumi continues, “it’s a great opportunity. Good location, close to the train station, and it’s a nice, quiet neighbourhood. I’d say it’s about all you can ask for, and more.”

She smiles, nodding. “It absolutely is.”

But Kisumi can tell she isn’t a hundred percent on-board. Which he finds out days later when the husband calls back to tell him they’re not buying, and it obviously doesn’t come as a surprise. Kisumi just has to keep looking, and hope he’ll be able to sell the house. Sure, it isn’t the most attractive property in Koganei, but he wasn’t lying when he said it’s situated in a nice area. The area makes up for most of the house, honestly, but Kisumi understands most people probably want to spend as little money and effort as possible on renovating a house they’ve just bought.

And so, his search for a buyer continues.

Kisumi doesn’t lie to potential buyers, he’s just smothering the details in sugar with the hopes that someone will have a bad enough sweet tooth to take the bait. Unfortunately, many of them are only pretending to be interested to only call back later and say they aren’t interested, or Kisumi won’t hear back from them at all. It always happens, and not just to him. The key thing is to act like he _isn’t_ still new at his job, but again, the degree helps with that.

One evening as Kisumi’s walking back home from work, his phone rings, and he sees the call is from Makoto. He’s baffled more than anything, but also hesitant to pick up. One thing he knows, though, is that if Makoto wants something, he’ll call again if he’s sent to voicemail. So Kisumi takes a deep breath, and then he picks up.

“Hey, Makoto.”

“ _Kisumi, hi. How are you?_ ”

It _has_ been a while by now, but does Makoto still expect him to be sad about what happened in Iwatobi, and what made him move to Tokyo in the first place? Kisumi doesn’t know, but he also isn’t about to pretend anything.

“I’m fine, thanks for asking. You?”

“ _Oh, same here. Miss having you around; it’s very quiet. Too quiet._ ”

Kisumi doesn’t know how to take that, but he decides on a polite laugh. “It’s nice to know I made some sort of difference.”

“ _Of course you did. Are you planning on coming back to visit anytime soon? Maybe you could come visit us for Christmas_?”

Kisumi winces. That’s just an invitation into disaster itself; Christmas with Rin and Makoto, and they’re expecting him to believe Haruka won’t be there? If they want to have a peaceful Christmas, inviting two former boyfriends is the first thing Makoto and Rin _shouldn’t_ do. Kisumi wonders if Makoto just hasn’t thought that far yet, or if he’s being to goddamn optimistic and naïve.

“I don’t know,” Kisumi replies. Now, he’s just standing outside his door like an idiot, mostly because of Makoto’s bold question to ask him to come back to Iwatobi. He wakes up from his temporary, weird trance, and enters his apartment.

“ _… Listen, Kisumi. If you’re worried about Haru, don’t be. I don’t actually know where he is._ ”

Kisumi raises his eyebrows, and now he kind of wishes he was talking to Makoto face to face instead. “What are you talking about?”

“ _He moved out of the house. Just up and left, barely said goodbye._ ”

Makoto wouldn’t lie about that just to get Kisumi to come back, would he? It seems like too mean of a lie, even for Rin who’s pulled similar crap in the past. It doesn’t make sense to Kisumi why Haruka would leave that precious house of his; he who wouldn’t even move out of there for Kisumi’s sake. What could’ve finally driven him to leave?

“You’re not trying to trick me now, are you? When was this?”

Makoto sighs. “ _No, Kisumi. He moved out of his house about two months ago. Didn’t say where he was going, just that he couldn’t be in Iwatobi anymore. He quit his job and everything_.”

A knot starts to form in Kisumi’s stomach, but he swats away his thoughts trying to enter his mind at Makoto’s disclosures. “Okay. Well, that’s… too bad.”

“ _I know things didn’t end well between you and Haru, but I’m just saying that… if he’s the only thing, or person, who’s keeping you from coming to visit, then he’s not even here anymore._ ”

It sounds bad when Makoto puts it that way, and it makes Kisumi feel guilty. “You know I’d come visit you anytime if I could.”

Now, Kisumi hears Makoto laugh softly. “ _I’m glad to hear that. Just… let me know in advance if you’ll stop by, okay? It’s only September so far, so you have time. Don’t be a stranger, Kisumi._ ”

Kisumi promises he won’t be a stranger, but he can’t promise he’ll come back to Iwatobi for Christmas. But like Makoto said, he _does_ have some time left to decide on whether or not he wants to come by their place to celebrate Christmas. Having lived in Tokyo for a while now, Kisumi can’t deny the fact that he does miss Iwatobi a little. He misses the quiet mornings, the smell of the ocean. Coming back would be a good way of taking a break from the hustle and bustle of Tokyo, he thinks.

The fourteenth of September falls on a Thursday, but Kisumi wants to take Sousuke out for a birthday beer after work, anyway. Which, of course, he tells his friend, who isn’t too thrilled about turning a year older, but at least he likes beer enough to say yes. (And maybe Kisumi’s company, too.)

As if it’s some sort of miracle, that day, Kisumi finally manages to sell the Koganei house. A couple with a two-year-old girl are looking to move into a new house in a quieter area, they have a pretty sizeable budget for renovating, and they’re apparently desperate enough to buy the not-so-modern house in a good neighbourhood of Koganei. Not that he wants to be _that_ guy, but Kisumi’s just glad he finally has that house off his hands.

So now, he has two reasons to celebrate tonight. It’s Sousuke’s birthday, and he’s finally sold the house in Koganei which he was starting to believe was cursed because he just couldn’t get it sold no matter what he did. Apparently, miracles _do_ happen.

“I saw the photos you sent me of that place,” Sousuke says. “I’m really impressed. And happy for you, of course.”

Kisumi grins, clinking his beer glass against Sousuke’s. “Thanks. But hey, that’s not what we’re here for. How was your day?”

“Eh, nothing special. They did make quite a fuss at the office, which I wasn’t too thrilled about. But I guess… it was a nice gesture.”

“Me taking you out for a beer isn’t too much, though, is it?”

Sousuke laughs. “No, it’s fine. I think I needed it as a last motivational push to get me through Friday. So thanks.”

It _would_ only be one beer, and then going back home. But it’s Sousuke’s birthday, both of them are happy and like spending time together so much that one beer doesn’t become just that. It comes more than that, turns into drunkenly making out around the back of the pub, and then hurriedly making it back to Sousuke’s place in Shibuya for what turns out to be birthday sex for Sousuke.

Kisumi discovers that Sousuke is fantastic in bed, and he almost asks himself why he only just now finds out.

 

* * *

 

On the morning of the fifteenth, Kisumi wakes up in his own bed with only a minor hangover, and he wonders to himself if last night was just a dream. Even if it wasn’t, they’re probably gonna treat it that way, Kisumi guesses. It’s probably for the best; Kisumi doesn’t want to ruin yet another great friendship with romance. You can always go from friendship to romance, but never the other way around.

He manages to work that day as normal. Thankfully, he has to stay in the office all day since he’s got some paperwork to go through and phone calls to make, following the Koganei house sale. His uncle is out of the office all day, so Kisumi’s stuck with some of the less fun people. It’s a good thing he can immerse himself in his papers and not really have to interact with anyone, because as much as he loves Katsumi, he sure doesn’t love the people Katsumi has employed at the agency.

When he’s finally done, Kisumi heads out to the front where he greets people looking at advertisements of the houses they currently have for sale. A couple is interested enough in a two-bedroom house located in Azabu-juban to book a viewing, and Kisumi hopes for yet another successful, and maybe even quick, sale. They want to live centrally, but still have access to nature and parks, in which case Kisumi thinks they’ve made a good choice. He’s still not a hundred percent familiar with Tokyo, even after half a year of having lived there, but he knows enough about most parts of Tokyo to make a guesstimate.

He can’t deny that he misses Iwatobi, though. Makoto’s offer is still standing, and his words are still echoing through Kisumi’s head every now and then.

“Hey, Kisumi,” Fujinuma says. “I’m heading out for a bit. Did you hear when Katsumi’s coming back?”

Kisumi looks up from the newspaper he’s been lazily reading by the counter. “Early afternoon, I think. Do you have a viewing scheduled?”

“That, and lunch,” Fujinuma replies. “Which means I’ll have to stuff my face before I go to meet this guy.”

Kisumi smiles. “Hope you at least get to enjoy your lunch.”

“Yeah, ha ha. Have a nice day.”

Fujinuma’s okay, Kisumi doesn’t mind him. He’s nice, and not awkward to talk to. Outgoing, of course, since that’s probably the most important personality trait Katsumi thinks people should have who work for him. Fujinuma can be a bit unpredictable sometimes, but thankfully it isn’t in a way that jeopardises the company he works for. Kisumi probably interacts with him more than anyone, but for a good reason—most of the others are either older and in a different stage of life, or they’re just not people Kisumi regularly hangs out with.

The place becomes empty, and quiet. Kisumi fishes his phone out of his pocket, and sees Rin has called him without him noticing. Now that he’s got some time, and people won’t be coming in so frequently due to it being lunch time, he takes the opportunity to call Rin back.

“ _Kisumi, hey_.”

“Hey, Rin. Did you call me earlier? Sorry, I missed it.”

“ _It’s okay, it wasn’t important. Just wanted to talk. How are things?_ ”

Kisumi smiles a little. He misses Rin. “Oh, pretty good. Not a lot of exciting stuff going on around here; it’s just the same old stuff.”

“ _Guessing the magic of Tokyo finally wore off, huh?_ ”

“I guess so,” Kisumi laughs. “How are you doing?”

 “ _Oh, I can’t complain. Mostly just dreading the colder temperatures. I finally gave in and wore a jacket today… it was a little bit depressing, not gonna lie_.”

“I’ve been wearing a jacket for a week now, I think.”

Rin snorts. “ _Well, you were always the one who was most sensitive to cold temperatures out of all of us._ ”

The little bell by the door chimes, and Kisumi instantly looks up to start his usual greeting. “Welcome! How c—oh.”

“ _What the hell was that_ ,” Rin laughs. “ _Gotta work on your manners, Kis._ ”

“Hey, uh, I should… go. Talk to you soon.”

“ _Sure! Hope to see you soon_.”

Kisumi barely hears Rin’s reply—he almost drops his phone mid-sentence, greeting the person walking in through the door. There’s no goddamn way this isn’t intentional. Did Makoto set this up? Was it his idea that Nanase Haruka should just casually walk into Kisumi’s workplace after them not having met or even _talked_ for over six months? Why is he even _here_?

For what feels like a good five or maybe ten minutes, Kisumi and Haruka just look at each other. Kisumi can’t read Haruka’s expression, and he’s not sure what kind of expression he himself is wearing. He doesn’t even know what to think. His ex is standing right in front of him after over half a year of them not having seen or heard anything of each other; what _should_ Kisumi think of it?

It doesn’t matter that he doesn’t think anything, but unconsciously, he certainly seems to feel something as a knot starts to form in his stomach. It becomes so uncomfortable after a certain point that Kisumi has to look away, swallow the weird lump in his throat.

“Long time no see,” he mutters. “Why’re you here?”

“I need a place to live, simple as that.”

Kisumi tries really hard not to bristle right there, but it’s incredibly difficult considering how nonchalant Haruka’s response is. “And you came to Tokyo for that?”

“Why not? Tokyo’s big, has a lot of opportunities. I like the houses I’ve seen, too.”

“Did Makoto tell you to come here?”

Haruka snorts, and when Kisumi dares look back at Haruka, he’s got his arms crossed, and eyebrows raised slightly, giving off an insulted or unimpressed expression. “Why should I do as Makoto tells me to do? He didn’t tell me anything. I came here because I wanted to.”

Kisumi wonders to himself if ‘here’ means simply Tokyo, or the real-estate firm in particular. Maybe it’s a self-centred way of thinking, but how big are the chances of Haruka coming to _his_ workplace, of all real-estate firms he could’ve otherwise gone to in Tokyo? Tokyo is big, there’s a lot of places to be other than right here this very second. Haruka could’ve maybe come there at another time, but gotten another agent. Instead, he came here today, and Kisumi just _had_ to be the only one left in the building.

Fate sure works in strange ways.

“So,” he says, clearing his throat. “Looking for a house, huh.”

“Yep.”

Is he supposed to act like he normally does around customers? He’s almost forgotten just how he normally _does_ that because Nanase fucking Haruka is standing right in front of him after such a long time of Kisumi, or apparently anyone, not having known where he was. But he’s here. Haruka is in Tokyo, he’s looking for a house, and he came to Kisumi for that. Apparently not on purpose, which Kisumi still finds hard to believe.

“… do you, uh, have any preferences?” God, this is weird. Kisumi winces inwardly at his own ineptness. “Big place, or small? City area or close to nature?”

Haruka slides a list forward that he’d kept folded up in his pocket. “Take a look.”

Kisumi up the note and eyes the list, which _so_ sounds like Haruka. It makes his heart ache, and he tries desperately to bat away his old feelings. Haruka’s written down that he wants a house or apartment with a lot of open space, a bathroom with a big bath tub, no particular preference for the bedroom except there has to be a window somewhere… He wants a place identical to the one he moved out of in Iwatobi, so why did he even leave?

Kisumi keeps his question to himself. He instead goes through some of the houses and apartments available around Tokyo based on Haruka’s list, presenting the choices to Haruka so he can pick a place, or a few, that he wants to take a closer look at. It all just feels so _strange_. Minutes ago, Kisumi was still blissfully unaware of where Haruka was, but now, he knows, and he also knows Haruka wants to move to Tokyo.

Which brings about another question he won’t ask: where’s Haruka staying right now? If he’s moved out of his house, he’s got to have somewhere else he lives. With a new lover, maybe, Kisumi muses. If that’s the case, it’s odd why said lover wouldn’t come with Haruka to book a viewing for a property they could end up moving into together.

The first thing that hit him was the realisation that Haruka has put down ‘ _house or apartment_ ’ on his list. Haruka used to be a house-person, which is the biggest reason why he didn’t want to move into Kisumi’s old apartment. He found them too confined, too small no matter what size they were, and not secluded enough. The last part is something Kisumi can agree with, but none of the other points made sense to him. He always just assumed Haruka would be opposed to living in an apartment no matter what, that no argument whatsoever could convince him to reconsider.

Kisumi puts his thoughts aside for now, and instead focuses on Haruka choosing a place to book a viewing at. It’s still very much surreal to him that this is happening, and that Haruka is in Tokyo, but he sarcastically guesses to himself that literally anything is possible. What’s next, is he going to get hit by lightning on his way home from work? Right now, that doesn’t seem like too unlikely of a thing to happen to him.

Based on Haruka’s preferences, Kisumi manages to find a few places around town that might suit Haruka’s tastes. _Might_. He remembers that one of the reasons their relationship fell apart in the end was the fact that Haruka can be the pickiest person Kisumi’s ever met: when it comes to food, mostly, but also regarding where and how he lives. Well, there’s obviously a reason he’s in Tokyo and why he hasn’t left yet, so Kisumi hopes he’s off to a good start.

Haruka decides on two of the houses Kisumi presents to him, and the two book viewings for next Wednesday. Kisumi thinks Haruka should consider himself lucky; not a lot of people can get the kind of treatment where they can squeeze in two viewings in one day. Actually, no one but acquaintances of Kisumi and Katsumi can do that, since they can move things around pretty much as they wish. It’s one of the nice things about working for his uncle, Kisumi thinks.

“Well then,” Kisumi says, and he’s a little relieved their meeting is coming to a close for now. He really needs to get back home, take a cold shower, and maybe yell into his pillow for an hour or so. “You have the addresses, the time booked, and my phone number. Anything else you need to know before Wednesday?”

“Yeah, one thing.” Kisumi looks up, and Haruka looks back at him with an expression Kisumi almost winces at. “It’s good to see you again, Kisumi.”

Kisumi clenches a fist by his side, and forces a smile as genuine as he possibly can. “Likewise, Haru.”

The very moment Haruka’s walked out the door, Kisumi heads out the back, and drives his fist into the wall. It’s a bad idea, because that evening when he takes a shower, it really stings where he broke the skin on his knuckles.

 

* * *

 

So his plan of not letting his feelings come back to the surface failed spectacularly. Kisumi barely functions as a human being the day after he met Haruka again—even Katsumi asks him at one point if he’s sick or something. Yeah, maybe he is. Maybe he’s become disgustingly lovesick, though definitely not in the good way people always talk about.

His knuckles are a great testament to how well he handled it then; he’s trying his best not to let it show since it’d be really difficult to explain to people. How _would_ he explain it? ‘My ex showed up here yesterday and I haven’t seen him in six months, and now I’m going to show him two houses since he wants to live here’. It doesn’t roll off the tongue, and it definitely doesn’t make sense. Nothing does. All Kisumi knows is that he’s become a complete mess after that day, and the closer he gets to Wednesday, the worse it gets.

“I have a confession to make,” Kisumi says, running his finger along the rim of his beer glass. “I’m an idiot.”

Sousuke laughs. “Well, I knew that much already. Tell me something I _don’t_ know.”

“I’m serious, Sousuke, I’ve… gotten myself into a big, big mess. You won’t believe what happened on Monday.”

“What, you woke up sore?”

“Ha ha. I’m being serious here for once.”

“Okay,” Sousuke says, and he takes a deep breath to calm himself down. “What’s up?”

“Haruka’s in Tokyo.”

There really isn’t a better way for him to put it. Haruka’s in Tokyo, and that’s the gist of it. He’s in Tokyo… but apparently to stay. For good, though? Who knows? The biggest question Kisumi really wants answered is _why_. He already knows why Haruka moved to Tokyo in one sense: because there are opportunities in the big, metropolitan capital of Tokyo. Sure, Kisumi can agree to that. But why did Haruka suddenly decide to leave Iwatobi if he liked it there so much? Haruka’s never been one to like change, and the biggest kind of change for Haruka that Kisumi can think of, it would be to move from the calm town of Iwatobi to the hustle and bustle of Tokyo.

Sousuke slowly sets his glass down, and blinks a few times, also slowly, before opening his mouth. “… Say that again?”

“Haruka’s in Tokyo. He wants to live here. Came to my fucking agency of all places, and booked viewings of two properties.”

“He moved away from Iwatobi? _Haru_ did?”

“I know! I don’t know why, but he did. Makoto told me a while ago, but I didn’t think he’d come to _Tokyo_ of all places.”

Sousuke raises his eyebrows slightly, taking a sip from his beer now that it’s safe to do so without risking it going down the wrong pipe. “Well, Tokyo’s the capital after all; I’d list that as one of a few possible places he’d move.”

Kisumi snorts. “Oh yeah? Any other places you can think of?”

“Osaka.”

“Ha, as if. With that accent all around him? He’d go nuts.”

“Sapporo, then. For a _big_ change of scenery, and the chance to get really familiar with snow.”

“… you’re just making shit up as you go, aren’t you?”

Sousuke snort-laughs. “Yeah.”

 

* * *

 

“Where are you headed to today, Kisumi?”

Kisumi puts his papers in order in his folder, tapping it once against the desk. “Nakano and Chiyoda. Same client, one house, and one apartment.”

“Oh,” Katsumi hums. “Is this the person you know from before who came here?”

“How’d you know?”

Katsumi smiles, tapping his temple with an index finger. “I noticed, and put two and two together. Glad to know the result wasn’t five this time.”

Apparently, Kisumi isn’t as good at hiding things as he’d like to be. He’s glad Katsumi doesn’t press further on the subject, and that he lets Kisumi head out to go meet Haruka outside so they can head to the first place together. Kisumi’s stomach has been in knots all morning, and he hates that he can’t just make it all disappear, that he can’t turn off those feelings he thought were long lost.

Haruka’s already waiting outside when Kisumi goes out front. Kisumi tries his best not to sound like a dumbass when greeting Haruka, but knows the instant his ‘hey’ comes out garbled that he’s already doomed. They get into Kisumi’s car, and Kisumi starts driving towards the first house in Nakano.

While driving to their first destination of the day, Kisumi realises he has absolutely no idea what he can fill the silence between them with. The last time they’d seen each other, he’d called Haruka basically a selfless asshole, and that’s something he _knows_ Haruka still remembers. But he can’t be too pissed about it still if he’s okay with Kisumi being his agent, right? Otherwise, if Kisumi were Haruka, he would’ve requested someone else to show him the properties.

… But why _wouldn’t_ he still be mad? On one hand, Kisumi doesn’t know yet how he feels about Haruka other than the fact that he knows his old feelings are desperately trying to bloom again. On the other hand, Kisumi wasn’t the only one being an ass back then. Maybe Haruka can agree on that, and maybe that’s why he’s in Kisumi’s car now.

“How’s living in Tokyo?” Haruka asks, breaking Kisumi out of his daydreaming. He really shouldn’t be doing that when he’s driving.

“It’s not bad,” Kisumi replies with a one-shouldered shrug. “Has its pros and cons. I do miss the peace and quiet sometimes, though.”

Haruka lets out a _huh_ , and looks out the passenger window. “Maybe I will, too, someday.”

The cryptic response only makes Kisumi more curious about Haruka’s reason for leaving Iwatobi behind after so long. It also doesn’t make sense to Kisumi why Haruka wouldn’t even tell Makoto why he’d move. They’ve been best friends since they were really young, and Kisumi thought the two shared practically everything. Or at least they _used_ to, but something clearly changed. It isn’t his place to ask since that’s a personal matter between Makoto and Haruka, so Kisumi refrains from asking about it. At least they don’t seem to be on bad terms, which might be the most important thing.

Kisumi parks outside the Nakano house, twirling the house keys on his index finger as he walks up the steps with Haruka close behind. It’s a nice day for early fall, allowing them to leave their jackets in the car while they go through the house. The house in question has a bedroom and a smaller room that can be used as a guest room. There’s one bathroom on each floor, and a smaller kitchen that has a door out to a little backyard.

It definitely has its charms, but Kisumi can early on tell that Haruka won’t go for this house. If it were him, Kisumi could probably have picked the house, but then it would obviously only be for himself and no one else. It reminds him of his earlier thought that maybe Haruka’s going to move here with someone else… but once again, said potential partner isn’t even here in the first place, and wasn’t the first time Haruka walked into the agency building, either.

“… so, it’s just you?” he dares ask, finally.

They’re standing in the living room where Haruka’s inspecting seemingly every millimetre—yet another sign that he won’t sign the contract for this place. Haruka looks up, and then back down at the fireplace again.

“Just me. Don’t tell me you heard something else from Rin or Makoto.”

Kisumi tries a laugh. Needless to say, he fails that, too. “No, they didn’t say a thing. Just… well, that you moved.”

He hopes that his words are enough to prompt Haruka to tell him why he moved in the first place, but Kisumi quickly realises that won’t happen, as Haruka goes back to looking around the house. The only way he’ll know now is if he asks, and he’s definitely not going to. It isn’t his place to ask considering how things ended between them, no matter how damn curious he is to know something not even Makoto knows.

“Kisumi, we… need to talk.”

The gravity in Haruka’s voice makes Kisumi almost nervous, though he has a pretty good idea what it is Haruka wants to talk about. And it’s probably a good idea that they do this now, since they never really _did_ talk things out. There really wasn’t any room for that six months ago when all they had for each other were insults, obscenities, and things Kisumi regrets having said to, and called, Haruka.

He cocks his head in the direction of the kitchen, towards the little table. “Probably better if we sit down.”

 _Because the last time we were anything like this, we were standing, and we were shouting_.

Haruka and Kisumi sit down opposite of each other by the kitchen table, and Kisumi waits for Haruka to speak up first since it was his initiative. Meanwhile, Kisumi prepares what to say himself, but he doesn’t know how to prepare for anything Haruka will say or ask him.

“I’m sorry,” Haruka begins, which Kisumi thinks is the best way to start off, though he’s still sad it had to come to this in the first place. “You were right. I was selfish, and I mostly thought of myself when we were dating. I was an ass, and you didn’t deserve that.”

Kisumi shakes his head. “It still didn’t give me the right to say those things to you. So I’m sorry, too. And… I’m glad you brought this up. Because I wouldn’t have been brave enough.”

Haruka laughs a little. “You’re braver than you think, Kisumi. You know, I… I really hadn’t planned on seeing you here. I didn’t even _know_ where you lived. But then I found your agency in an ad somewhere, and I just knew I had to come see you.”

“ _That’s_ why you walked in?”

“Pretty stupid, right? I had no idea how you’d react, what you’d say, hell—you could’ve banned me from ever entering that place again. I got really lucky, and I was reminded of what a kind person you’ve always been. And it makes me feel so much shittier, because I took all of that for granted. I wasn’t supportive of you, I barely ever complimented you.”

Kisumi’s relieved to know it wasn’t just him being self-centred when he thought Haruka had walked into the real-estate agency because of him that day. At the same time, it makes him wonder again if maybe fate really _is_ trying to steer him in a specific direction. Wherever it is, he’s definitely interested in knowing where it leads. So far, he feels like he’s been at a standstill for the longest time, but maybe now things are finally starting to move again.

“It’s in the past,” Kisumi says. “Yes, it hurt, and yes, it pissed me off. But I’m past it now. All I want is to put those things behind me.”

“What things, exactly?”

Kisumi smiles sadly. “The negative aspects. I just… want to keep the good memories.”

He instantly feels it’s way too much information, so he gets up from his chair, and he clears his throat. “Well, let’s continue looking through the house, hmm?”

Haruka looks up at him, and then nods silently before getting up from his chair, too.

They continue going through the house, once more to help Haruka make a decision. The second time they walk around the house, it’s significantly less awkward, and it feels… nice. Like maybe there’s a chance they could start over, and _not_ be constantly irritated with each other. All it took was half a year apart and being in completely different parts of the country.

Kisumi feels like these past six months have definitely helped him grow, though. This time apart from Haruka has made him change, made him into a more independent and much more mature person than he was before. He feels like he sees things from a different, clearer, perspective now, and looking back, he really doesn’t miss his old self.

“Well, I think I’ve seen enough,” Haruka says after a while. “It’s nice, but…”

“… not what you’re looking for?”

“Yeah. Sorry.”

Kisumi holds his hands up. “Hey, it’s not my house. Do you wanna grab lunch before we head to the next place?”

“I do,” Haruka says gratefully. “Let me buy you lunch.”

“Oh, I couldn’t let you do that.”

“But I can. Please.”

Kisumi opens his mouth to protest further, but his words die in his throat. Instead, he sighs in defeat, shakes his head, and smiles a little. “Fine.”

Following a nice seafood lunch, they return to Kisumi’s car to drive half an hour away to Chiyoda. The second and last property they’re looking at is a five-minute walk away from Hibiya Park, and on the other side of it is the expensive, glamorous Ginza district. It’s funny how much the property prices vary depending on which side of Hibiya Park you live, because on one side, it’s definitely affordable, whereas on the Ginza side, you’d have to have a ridiculously well-paid job and then some in order to afford living there.

The apartment is located on the fifth floor in the building, and it has a balcony with a great view of the park that separates the so-called ‘commoner district’ from Ginza. It comes at a great cost, at least considering the fact that it’s an apartment and not an entire house, and Kisumi wonders just how the hell Haruka’s going to afford this if he even wants the flat in the end.

Walking around the apartment that Kisumi’s only ever seen pictures of, he finds himself really envious of people who get to live like this. It’s spacious, bright, has large windows, a nice kitchen in which more than one person can cook at once, and a bathroom with the nicest bath tub Kisumi’s seen in a while. If possible, he’d wish for Haruka to go for the house so he could buy the apartment, but there are two factors stopping this from happening. The first is his own bank account, and the second is the fact that he works for the agency that sells the stupid apartment.

In another life and another reality, Kisumi imagines himself moving in there, and maybe getting a dog to share the space with him.

“This is a ridiculously nice apartment,” Kisumi says mostly to himself. He looks over at Haruka, who doesn’t look as convinced. “What do you think?”

Haruka chews on his lower lip, and then turns to walk into the kitchen, where he stops and stands by the window. Puzzled, Kisumi follows, and Haruka looks at him when Kisumi goes to stand next to Haruka, enjoying the nice view from the window.

“I don’t want this place.”

“What about the Nakano house?”

“I don’t want it, either.”

Kisumi furrows his eyebrows, even more confused. “Do you want to look at other properties, then? I’m sure I have a list on my phone somewh—”

“I want a place with you, Kis. I… I miss you.”

Kisumi turns his head so fast he feels like he almost got whiplash. The raw emotion displayed in Haruka’s eyes and on his face makes Kisumi almost lose the air in his lungs, and he has to look away because it’s so… much. It’s a lot at once, but finally, a question that's been burning on his tongue since that first day he met Haruka after so long makes it past his lips.

“Can I ask why you moved from Iwatobi?”

Haruka sighs. ”Because I couldn’t stand living there when you weren’t around anymore. Everything just reminded me of you. I realised I needed a fresh start somewhere I _wouldn’t_ see you everywhere. Pretty ironic considering where I ended up, and where you already had been since then.”

It sounds like a very Haruka-like thing to do: to move away from a place filled with memories he associated with something good that is no more. It sounds even _more_ like a Haruka-like thing to do to not tell anyone why he’s moving, and barely give a reason as to why he _is_ moving in the first place.

“Why didn’t you tell anyone why or where you were moving?”

Haruka laughs humourlessly, shrugging. “I wasn’t really thinking clearly back then. All I knew was that I had to get away, and that I had to do it fast. I guess I also felt guilty towards Makoto that I couldn’t bring myself to tell him where I was moving since I knew he’d come after me. I didn’t want that. As for why… well, he already knew.”

Kisumi exhales slowly, processing the information he’s been wanting to know for what feels like forever now. “You know, I tried so hard not to fall for you again. But you came back into my life, and then it didn’t take much, and I was right there again. I’d lie if I said I don’t miss you, too, Haruka.”

After all this time, nothing has changed at the same time as everything has. They’ve changed, they’ve matured, they’ve grown, but their feelings stayed intact despite everything.

Haruka walks forward, and doesn’t stop until he’s in Kisumi’s arms, back where he belongs, where he was always supposed to be. Kisumi embraces Haruka, takes in his scent, the feel of him, the knowledge that Haru, his Haruka, is here again. Maybe this time they could make it work. Many things have changed, but their feelings haven’t. They won’t know if it works out unless they try.

“I guess we’ll have to find a house via some other place,” Kisumi says, and he laughs again. Haruka looks up at him, basically looking like a question mark.

“Why? Because you can’t go through your uncle’s agency?”

“Exactly.”

“Oh. Well… are you okay with that?”

Kisumi gives Haruka a kiss on the forehead, lingering there. “Yeah. I could really use a bigger apartment, anyway.”

 

* * *

 

“Don’t you think they’ll freak out seeing us outside their door? That’d be hilarious.”

Haruka laughs. “They’ve seen it before.”

“Yeah, but it’s been a while.”

“Neither of them are particularly forgetful, so I doubt it. We _could_ always pretend we’re still mad at each other, if that’s what you want.”

Kisumi snorts, and looks out the train window at the scenery passing by so fast he can’t make out any shapes but blurry, colourful clouds. “Nah. I’m done being pissy.”

He feels Haruka take his hand, and in response gives a light squeeze. “Me too.”

It turns out that Kisumi had been half right, and Haruka completely wrong. Makoto _does_ sort of freak out when he sees Haruka and Kisumi standing next to each other outside his door, but Rin looks like he knew all along that they’d get back together. (The smug bastard.) Sousuke also looks like he knew, though he at least doesn’t have a smug grin on his face when he greets the last two guests to arrive.

“This is the best Christmas gift ever,” Makoto says, and Haruka snorts, rolling his eyes.

“Wow, that’s mean. We spent money and put effort into buying you gifts, and you think something that _didn’t_ cost money was better? Thanks, Makoto.”

“Haru, that’s not—gah, I fell for it again, didn’t I?”

Rin and Kisumi laugh, giving each other a high five. Kisumi then turns to Makoto again, exhaling slowly to get rid of the laughter still bubbling within him.

“We’re only teasing you because we like you, Makoto.”

“That’s what teachers told Ran when she was little and boys would pick on her,” Makoto mutters. “Guessing it’s the same thing, huh.”

“It is,” Sousuke confirms.

 

* * *

 

It starts the way Kisumi imagines most relationships do. It has an end, but it also has a new beginning. And that new beginning is one Kisumi could have never predicted, but he’s very glad for that.

**Author's Note:**

> Summary (revised): A guide on how to screw up so badly you have to move from Iwatobi to Tokyo, courtesy of Shigino Kisumi and Nanase Haruka.
> 
> \--
> 
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